Life. Crazy, Chaotic, Ours!

Limitless Life : Afraid to Courageous...My Goliath

My new favorite quote can also be viewed as a statement of my recent health storm.  You know, the one where leukemia invaded my body so rampantly that it took a bone marrow transplant to rid it and restore health to my physical being. 

This quote.

 This one right here by the one and only Nelson Mandela - and if the photo is too small to read, here it is: 

"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.  The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear."

 

It packs a powerful punch for me, especially when I put it in context of the battle I fought from December 2012 through present.  So many people have commented how brave I have been through this or how courageous I was during this horrific disease, but I can tell you this for certain:  You are only as brave as the armor you put on.  The weapons I chose to arm myself with?  Faith and trust in God and the knowledge of who I am in Him.

I am participating in a new online Bible study through Proverbs 31 ministries, which I mentioned the other day when I shared my meaning of community.  The study has recently begun and it is based on the book, “Limitless Life” by Derwin Gray.  He was an NFL football player (not that this non-sports girl would have known) and is presently the founding pastor of the Transformation Church.   I’m not going to give away everything in the book or the study, because you really need to read it for yourself and evaluate your own feelings and life journey as you go through the book.  Besides, I’m only through Chapter 2, having begun reading the book on Tuesday.  This very first chapter, “from Afraid to Courageous”, completely grabbed me and sucked me into the book from that quote alone.

Making the comparison between David & Goliath:

DAVID	VS	GOLIATH
Small and meek		Big and Mighty
Shepherd boy		Warrior
Weapons:  a slingshot and some pebbles		Weapons:  a sword and shield
Youngest of 8 sons of Jesse		Over 9 feet tall
Israelite and repeated, yet repentant,   sinner		Champion of Philistines
Confident in Faith		Confident in Power

 

One would think it was easy to declare a winner before the battle would even begin.  Obviously, to the naked eye, Goliath had a huge advantage over David.  Unless you look at the last of my comparison….both had confidence, yet Goliath  was confident in “power” and his role as a warrior, yet David, an average sinner, was confident  in his “faith” and relied on the armor of God.  In knowing that no matter his mental or physical shortcomings, sins, or lot in the earthly life, he had favor in God’s eyes…as all of us do…David found the strength to be BRAVE and COURAGEOUS in the face of the biggest giant many would ever see.

If you are unfamiliar with this story, read through I Samuel 17 for more information on the warriors and the battle.

Inarguably, Nelson Mandela is certainly a man who would know what fear and courage are.  Perhaps that is a reason this quote is really sticking with me…or, perhaps, it is because I can see a huge part of my own self in this statement when looking at my own personal battle with a Goliath in my life…

JULIE	VS	CANCER (acute myeloid leukemia)
Small and meek		Big and Mighty
40+ year old wife, mother, daughter,   friend		Invasive life sucker
Weapons:  prayer, doctors, advanced medicine		Weapons:  quickly dividing and increasing cells that   are strong
Jesus girl but a sinner, nonetheless		Worst Illness Ever
Just one person		Octopus-like tentacles invading my   life & the lives of those I love
Confident in Faith		Confident in Destruction

 

Yet here I stand.  On Christ, the solid rock…my firm foundation.  I did not know what my diagnosis would bring me.  I had many dark, scary nights in a hospital room, somewhat unconsious, as the medicines did their best to battle against the cancer.  However, I am convinced that the singlemost reason I was able to face this battle and had any chance of coming out ahead of cancer and returning home to my family was for one simple piece of armor that I have taken up my entire life:  my faith in God.

Was I scared?  Absolutely!

Am I still?  Oh, definitely.

How do I handle those fears?  Through prayer, the Word, devotionals and love.  Love of my family and friends and the love of God & Jesus Christ.  And you know what?  Even in the eye of the storm, those fears are calmed when I go to God.  "Jesus Take the Wheel"...not just a country song by Carrie Underwood, but a prayer uttered from the lips of a sinner who needs guidance. 

We teach it to our children to trust God and the Veggie Tales' gang proclaims it, "God Is Bigger Than the Boogey Man".  Once you truly believe and take up that suit of armor...the one of faith and trust and knowing to whom you belong, life is truly limitless.

 

It is simply a matter of focusing on that belief to get past the fear and Satan.  Anyone can be courageous with Christ.

It is not small gift that God gave Jesus to die on the cross for our sins.  That single gift is what helps me move mountains of fear so that I can triumph over the scariness of this journey.  Through Christ alone, I have the couarge to face my Goliath.  And regardless of how the medical arena may view the outcome … i.e. remission or recurrence, I know that the battle is won because God always triumphs over Satan…I take my cross with me everywhere because, as Derwin Gray was wise to point out, it wasn't just Jesus who walked out of the tomb the third day after he died on the cross for our sins, it was COURAGE.  That cross I carry brings me courage to believe that I belong to God and Jesus.  And because I believe in Jesus, I am confident that He will defeat all of my giants in life.

 

Faith on Friday : Community & a Limitless Life

I'm participating in an online Bible Study through Proverbs 31 ministries.  We're diving into the book:

I am pretty excited about this!  The description of the book from the Proverbs 31 site reads as follows:

Labels you have internalized and apply to yourself every day. Labels like Afraid. Or Addict. Orphan. Damaged Goods. Failure. Maybe even Religious. These labels might be sewn into your life with such tight little stitches that they feel like a part of you. They feel like they define you. But that’s a lie. If you let Him, Jesus can remove those old labels and tattoo new ones onto your soul. Then you’ll begin to see yourself as God the Father sees you. The limits will be lifted, and your life will be transformed. It’s the truth. Join Pastor Derwin Gray on a fascinating journey into what can happens when you offer your head, your heart, and your hands to the only one who can offer you truly limitless life.

The Bible Study begins on May 25 ... just a few days away and it's not too late to sign up!  The book, available on the website of course, is also available in digital format for download via Barnes & Noble for a Nook, and I assume it is available for a Kindle format as well.  Since I jumped on this Study a little late, I opted to download a Nook version so I would have the book to start on time.  I'll just keep notes in a journal to help me keep track of my thoughts as I go along!

The lead question posed in describing this book (taken from the site) is this:

Is your life limited by labels the world and other people have used to define you? 

Labels.  The Labeling Theory.  This is something I have definitely discussed on a regular basis with my children, girlfriends and the young ladies I have mentored thorugh church.  All of us label everything and everyone.  It's something so hard to get away from and we often label people without even having a true sense of who or what they are, or, more importantly, we don't know what is truly in their heart. 

Labels have always plagued the human race.  Won't it be great to realize our full potential by seeing ourselves through God's eyes?  I'm assuming the only label He assigns each of us is "My Child" or "Wonderful Masterpiece".

Wow.  Can you even begin to imagine putting a t-shirt on every person that reads "Wonderful Masterpiece"?  A community of Christ Followers who are able to recognized their worth and truly be happy to own that label rather than, perhaps, being embarrassed by a label given to them in the past.

This Study will introduce me to an online community of individuals whom I have never met and they are seeking the same truths as me.  We want to know the grand plan God has for us and we want to own the fact that we are 'fearfully and wonderfully made'.

So, exactly what is "community"?  It's a pretty important word when one reads through their Bible.  Rarely, does a person work alone for the glory of God.  Many passages encourage us to support each other, love each other, work together...so let's look at how I define community.

Descriptive words that come to mind under "community":

• gather
• join
• share
• involvement
• kinship
• supporting
• uplift
• common views

I have been known to point out, on many occasions, that women have a very difficult time with a good understanding of "community".  We are quick to acuse, compare, and drag down each other as we proclaim our way as the right way.  How naive we can be!

Ephesians 4 gives us instructions for Christian living.  It reminds us that when we work well together, the community of Christ believers grows and, though building each other up, we also glorify God.  A community of Christ believers is so pleasing to God as he has given each of us unique gifts and talents that we can [and should] share with one another to bring the good to all.  Nowhere in Ephesians [or any other chapter in the Good Book] do we read that we should compare. 

We are instructed to love, build and encourage.  These are qualities that help a community thrive and these instructions can apply to all communities, but most importantly, to the community of Christ & God Believers.

God LOVED us so much that He gave his only Son for forgiveness of our every sin; God BUILDS us up through His Word and faithfulness in each step of our earthly journey; and He certainly ENCOURAGES us to take up our cross and follow Him through every garden and every valley we encounter.

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact your are doing." (1 Thessalonians 5:1)

"But encourage on another daily, as long as it is called 'Today', so that none of you may be hardened by sin's decietfulness." (Hebrews 3:1)

What type of community are you building up today?  Who are you encouraging and loving?

God is encouraging each of us to encourage each other...one person at a time...one set of feet moving toward one good direction.

I invite you to join this online Bible Study community at P31 with me and please share what qualities you believe are vital to a thriving community!

Throwback Thursday. Stories of a girl of getting them documented.

Throwback Thursday is a fun once-a-week event held on social media.  It’s been ‘trending’ for awhile now.  Finding an old photo, sharing it for your online friends to enjoy, and maybe sharing a sentence or two about the memory.

I enjoy Throwback Thursday and frequently share a photo and memory.  Some days I even blog about the memory. I graduated from high school in 1987, so I am truly a teen of the 80's and a child of the 70's.  Love, love, love my childhood memories of family and friends.  The warm fuzzy feelings come back instantly when I pull out a picture to 'throwback' and share.   Amazing what a photo can spark, huh?

A moment captured in print lights a spark that sets forth a sentence or two that can become a paragraph [or more].  It’s part of a story…your story…and worthy of an audience.  Be that voice and share with an audience…no matter the size of the memory or the size of the audience…any and everything is worthy of a pause and acknowledgement of what it was/is.

Each of us has a story within us.  It has been said that our lives are like books and we each have many chapters or volumes before our time here is complete.  Is your story being told? 

The “throwback Thursday” trend has caused many of us, myself included, to dig through piles or albums of old photographs and relive events of our lives and seek to remember those milestones.  I am challenging myself, and invite you along also, to get those stories told.  To document.  To write.  To share with an audience…a little more than putting a photo out there for others to see.

The THROWBACK THURSDAY STORIES is an easy way to do this.  Here’s what you need to do to play along.

GATHER … your photos.  Dig them out of storage, boxes, or albums.  Assemble them in some fashion into baggies or piles and group according to the memory or feeling for your story.  Pretend you are running a cartoon strip of a story in your head.  That will help with organization.  Don’t use too many photos for each story…just a few or one if that's what you have.  Chances are, if you aren’t in high school or younger, your photos were taken with film, so having too many of a particular memory shouldn’t be a problem.   Don't have a photo for the story you want to tell?  Google for an image and print it out!

ACQUIRE … some type of adhesive (glue stick, glue pen, scrapbook tape), paper trimmer or scissors, a pen to write with (I prefer rolling ball pens or felt tips), and whatever accessories you are comfortable with for embellishing, if you desire.  The embellishments aren’t important – your stories are the main focus. 

GRAB … yourself a 3-ring binder…plain or pretty, the choice is yours, some clear page protectors and a pack of 8 ½ x 11 cardstock…no need to go big for this project.  Or, if you prefer, find some sort of journaling album to use.  They are plentiful in office supply stores, big box store or craft stores.  I have a borderline addiction for journals and notebooks and come up with an excuse to acquire a new one at any time.

I am a READER and a WRITER and a CREATIVE girl, so here’s how I plan to PLAY this CHALLENGE.

Every other week, as I participate in Throwback Thursday, I intend to capture that photograph and memory in a journalistic approach aka scrapbooking the memory.  This will help me record my story and the meaningful times/relationships in my life.  I am not setting about this in any particular ‘timeline’ order.  I will grab a photo that evokes a feeling and document the moment.  It’s not about keeping something in chronological order; it’s simply about telling the story.

This is something you can do even if you are not a scrapbooker!  If you are a scrapbooker, particularly one with children or grandchildren, it is likely that your story is not being told in your pages.  The documenter (aka woman with the scrapbook stuff) is usually so focused on getting everything down for everyone else in our family that we tend to forget that we, too, have a story that matters.

First story up for me:

Our visit with ET @ Universal Studios when I had just turned 21 years old.  Such a great vacation!  And, I had such great hair at this time in my life!  I think I was channeling my Julia Roberts' Pretty Woman look that was helped along with a perm and a small barrel curling iron.  This is one of my favorite photos of Scott and I together of all-time.  Here's the story I documented quite simply.  It literally was done in less than 15 minutes.

My base was a piece of 8 1/2 x 11 cardstock and then I matted my photo ... actually a copy of my photo.  The original photo is a polaroid and I have no clue where it got to.  Thankfully, my Mom had the original scanned and put a copy in my childhood photo album for me.

I grabbed a couple of coordinating designed papers, a marker and some labels.  The most important thing on this page, with the exception of the photo?

The notes I made...aka the story.  Not too detailed, but enough to convey my feelings for anyone who looks at this.

"9/6/90.  Universal Studios, Florida, ET's Closet.  *drives on the beach * first alcohol purchase * lots of arcade game play * huge Italian meatballs * introduction to jai lai * grehound races * breakfasts @ Bob Evans * lunches @ Hooters - best curly fries ever!"

"Vacation to Daytona Beach with Scott, his Mom & Ray.  A day a Universal -- this was the highlight.  Big hair (permed), cut boyfriend, slouch socks & I could still wear a bikini!  This picture is a favorite."

 

That's it.  Simple.  Quick.  But the memory is there.  Embedded in those few words and single photo, is the memory of a really cool time in my past.

Now, I just need to slip the finished page into a sheet protector and lock it into my binder to keep safe...my own book-in-progress that I can share.

So, grab a photograph, tell a story and 'throw it back' here so I can read your story.  I am hoping to do this weekly...every Thursday...but if I miss a week, I'm not going to stress.  Each time I write a chapter (photograph/memory), I'm one step closer to telling the story of my life.

 

 

Words on Wednesday : Celebrating Life...in Music.

 

So this may be a weird question and blog entry, but here goes:

Have you ever thought about what music you would like to played at your funeral or how you hope you would be remembered? 

I have...and not just since I've come face-to-face with leukemia.  I've thought about it many times over the years.  In part, I assume, because I am a planner and I love details, especially those that involve a celebration.

I'm sure I have completely lost you by now...funeral and celebration in the same post?  While our human minds and spirits have a hard time wrapping around the 'celebration' idea, that is what a funeral should be ... a celebration of someone's life and a celebration of their going home to be with our Heavenly Father.

While I do not intend to be pushy and leave notes for Scott or our kids on what I would want to happen, I do know that there are a couple of songs I would like incorporated in a service celebrating my earthly life.  You know, kind of playing in the background as a soundtrack is what comes to mind.

"I Can Only Imagine" by MercyMe definitely comes to mind each time I think about someone arriving at Heaven's gates, so I think that would be one that I would like to have.

"How Great is Our God" by Chris Tomlin...my all-time favorite contemporary Christian song.  My grandfather loved "How Great Thou Art" and so I guess my tie to this song as some sentimental reason also, but mostly it is because God is so great and good and I love the message in the lyrics of this song.

"The Circle of Life" by Elton John from the Lion King.  I don't think an explanation is needed here.

"Little Wonders" by Rob Thomas.  Finding the beauty and detail in each and every second of life...yea, that's one of my life mottos.

"Amazing Grace (My Chains are Gone)"...Chris Tomlin's version only and "No Chains on Me" by Chris Tomlin immediately after...upbeat and descriptive of how I envision it will feel when we arrive in Heaven.

"I'm Already There" by Lonestar...these lyrics just get me, even though the song has been around for awhile..."I'm already there.  Take a look around.  I'm the sunshine in your hair.  The shadow on the ground. I'm the whisper in the wind. I'm your imaginary friend. And I know I'm in your prayers
Oh I'm already there. ... And I'll be there until the end. Can you feel the love that we share. Oh I'm already there."

and, most definitely, the two songs that prompted this writing, not your average, run-of-the-mill "memory" songs, but, oh so appropriate for me --

"Don't Stop Believing" by Journey.  Great memories of this song and, more importantly, a great message to leave my kids about their faith, their dream and living..."don't stop believing, hold on to the feeling".

and

"I've Had the Time of My Life" by Bill Medly and Jennifer Warnes...you know, from the Dirty Dancing movie.  Scott and I loved dancing to this song, so good memories there, and I definitely thing it sums up my life...

No matter when the time arrives, I have always managed to enjoy the details within the span of my life...I have always endeavered to have the time of my life...and there are many people I owe that to.

And, if, just if, anyone would be inclined to do the "Thriller" dance afterward, I'd be so down with that...and I'd be dancing through the clouds and shaking it at the same time!

If you could pick a song or two for a celebration of your life, what comes to mind?

 

Disney Characters Wanted: Sign here!

In 2007, as we were planning a "BIG" Disney trip, I decided I didn't want to buy autograph books, though I knew our kids would be way into meeting the characters.  After all, they were 2, 5 and 8 years old at the time of trip and Disney is mentioned in our home in some fashion and enjoyed each and every day.  

This was a big trip that we had been saving for  because we were splurging and staying in the Animal Kingdom Lodge - a deluxe resort - which was affordable with careful planning, taking advantage of the free Disney dining promotion, and squirreling away money for a couple of years.  Ben (pictured above) had a huge heart and big love for animals, so we booked a room with bunk beds and a savannah view of the animals.  Truly, it was a wonderful vacation and, in fact, during a tram ride one day while in Disney, Scott and I both said we didn't want the week to end.   Everyone just had so much fun.

I decided to make our kids each a personalized autograph book that would double as a memory book.  I take lots of pictures; I don't want to miss capturing a magic moment.  I knew there was no way I could do a traditional scrapbook of memories and incorporate the photos of our kids with the characters and a personalized autograph book that doubles as a mini scrapbook ... well, that would work perfectly!

Here's how I did it.  It's simple, really, just put aside a few hours several weeks prior to your vacation and you'll have something you just need to add photos to after the vacation is over!

Keep your supplies simple.  Disney colors are predominantly red, white and black.  That's what I decided to stick to.  

I took a photo of each child with Mouse ears on before we left to create a personalized cover.  Don't have Mouse ears?  Use a Disney stuffed animal or some other Disney treasure that you have on hand.

I visit my local craft store often and found some red, white and black patterned ribbons in the 99 cents bin.  Perfect for decorating your spiral ring, should you decide to go that route.  If you don't have the ability to punch spiral rings, you have other options.  You can go to an office supply store such as Staples and they will do it for you and bind it, or...go to Staples and pick up notebook rings and a hole punch to create a small 'binder' effect.  Either way you'll  have a bound product in the end.

 From your local craft store, with coupons and on several trips, pick up:

• a few sheets of red cardstock, black cardstock and a sheet or two of Disney patterned paper that you like.
• stickers/embellishments of Disney characters that you know you want to see and get photos or autographs from.
• Disney punches or stamps if you want to embellish in that fashion.
• Adehesive to hold everything together.  I prefer Tombow Mono Adhesive, but the brand doesn't matter.

You will also need:

• a couple of pieces of chipboard. (the backing from a notepad will do fine - just save them when you use the last of the writing pad.)
• a paper cutter.
• a black sharpie (and some spares - I took a fine and medium tip; the princesses can hold a fine tip, but the animated characters prefer a medium tip).

Assembling your album:

Your cover should be slightly larger than your pages.  My cover is 6 1/4 inches.  My pages are 6x6 inches.  We have three children and I didn't want anything too cumbersome to carry in the backpack throughout the parks, but I knew I wasn't going to use any photo larger than a 4x6 once completed.  Many of our photos are cut down to a 3 1/2 x 5 traditional size. 

Cut two pieces of chipboard to 6 1/4 x 6 1/4 when you cut your cover paper.  I downloaded free Disney fonts to create my heading and printed it directly onto my red cardstock for the cover.  You can use stickers or handwrite if you desire.  The chipboard makes the book more sturdy.  Adhere the chipboard between the cover page and the Disney pattern paper to finish off the inside.

Since my album was a 6 x 6 size, I was able to buy a pack of 12 x 12 white cardstock and get 4 sheets per piece.  Cut and cut and cut until you have enough pages (plus a few extra) for the characters you want to visit.  Then, you set about embellishing your pages for your characters.  I ended up leaving many blank for surprise characters, but I definitely had pages for the traditional gang, the princesses, and the other characters I knew were easy to locate in the parks.

*Check out various Disney-related websites for suggestions on what characters to find and where.  My favorites are www.disboards.com and www.allearsnet.com, but a google search will lead you to so many neat sites and blogs.  

And remember, you don't need to buy expensive stickers or embellishments...use the ones that come in the mail for movie offers.  Check clearance bins.  The autograph and photo will be the stars of the book.  The character sticker is just for fun.

And if you don't want to spend the money on 20,000 stickers or can't find a specific character, there's always a google search for free clipart to use.  Copy, paste, size it down and mat it in front of some colored cardstock and go with it.  

There are a few characters, such as Buzz, who use stampers for their autograph instead of pens.

A few tips on using your autograph books in the Parks:

• Remember to take photos of getting the autograph in addition to one of your kid/friend with the character.  It's great to see the interaction and, often more fun, than a posed shot in the long run.
• Take your own photos!  Sure, the Disney cast members will take photos and give you a photo pass so you can purchase the pictures, but you know your children and you will likely get as good of a photo and maybe even one with a more genuine expression or interaction, and it won't cost you as much!  No harm in letting the cast members take the photos also and then you can review at home to decide what to buy and what not to buy.  Want a photo of your entire family?  Ask the cast member to use your camera for a shot or ask the family behind you to take it for you and then you can take a photo for them as a thank you.
• Keep the size of your autograph book practical.  As I said, 6x6 works great...not too bulky and easily accommodates a standard size photo.
• Take your own sharpies...and a few extras in case they dry out.  
• Put your autograph books in individual gallon ziploc bags and your sharpies in sandwich bags when you go through the Parks.  The baggies will help keep them safe from rain and the occasional water bottle spill in your stroller or backpack.
• Be prepared.  As you are standing in line for the character, start flipping your autograph book open to that spot and have the book and pen ready for the character.  You don't want to hold up the line behind you just as you wouldn't want to stand there forever waiting for the person in front of you.
• If you don't get every autograph you want on a certain vacation, well there's the perfet excuse to schedule a return trip and use the book again to fill in the blanks! 

Oh, and remember, character meals are great opportunities to get character autographs.

The autograph books I made for my kids have been lovingly looked through over the years.  They evoke memories even though they were young during this trip.  The photographs contained in these pages help that memory come back to life and definitely capture the magic that is synonymous with the word "Disney".  You can only scrapbook a vacation so many times, including Disney World. Finding a unique and easy way to preserve those memories is what this little autograph book is all about!

See ya real soon! 

 

Words on Wednesday : If my puppy could speak, he would say...

My BMT doctor finally gave us the green light on the dog situation and we wasted no time!

On Thursday, the doctors said I was far enough in my recovery that we could get a puppy.  Thursday evening, Scott began the search and by Friday evening at 8:00 p.m., we had a new family member in the car and were heading to PetSmart for a few items (including food) and then home.  Needless to say, we’re all in puppy love!

It was a fun surprise for the kids, who knew nothing until Friday afternoon when I told them we had some place important to go that evening.

Meet Marty.  Our totally “adorkable” (not a typo) puppy. 

He is a dorkie.  His mama is a dachshund and his papa is yorkie terrier.  Hence, the mixed breed name of “dorkie” and totally appropriate for this family.  Currently, his body is only as long as our television remote and he weighs almost three pounds.  He may get up to about ten pounds when he is fully grown.

After a few days of spending most of his time with me, here is some insight into how Marty describes me and his new world:

“She is turning out to be a good Mama.  She kisses me constantly and I’m pretty sure I’ve got her wrapped around my paw.”

“Her neck is so soft.  I love to snuggle against it and let out big sighs.  When we travel in the car, I love to curl up behind her shoulders against the seat and rest my head on her shoulder.  It’s just bliss.”

“This new Mama of mine sure likes her camera.  More often than not, it’s pointed in my direction these days.  So weird.”

“Boy she talks to me a lot…a lot more than my birth mama.  And she sings.  It’s okay, not great, but she seems to know the words to every song she hears and there’s almost always music on during the day.”

“She also sits at her desk and leaves me on the floor sometimes.  I don’t like that.  Every now and then I don’t mind sitting at her feet on the desk shelf below, but I’d really rather be on her lap.  Not sure why she isn’t always down with this plan.”

“Lookie here.  I think I found my true home.  These humans call each other dorks too.  They are going to be my favorite mixed breed!”

“What is the problem with me nibbling on her craft things?  Doesn’t she get the meaning of share?”

“What are these words “potty outside” she speaks of?  I know not what she means!”

“Walk?  Walk?  Why would she even think these paws should hit the ground when I’ve got all of these humans surrounding me who think I’m the cutest ever!  Just pick me up already!”

“Yea, this is pretty good.  I think I could get used to this life pretty easily!  I hope they know how lucky they are to have me.”

---thoughts are original to Marty, "McFly" on occasion...just waiting for his hover board to arrive, though he has no plans to go "back to the future"...he's quite content in his current home. 

 

Editor's Note:  Those who do not believe in pet therapy for individuals undergoing or recovery from a stressful emotional situation don't know what they're talking about.  It was a huge emotional jump for me finding out that we were to a point in my leukemia/bmt recovery where my family could once again enjoy the company of a four-legged member.  We have had Marty less than a week and I can already tell the difference he has made in my emotional well-being, as well as that of our children.  Everthing feels a bit more normal and my fatigue level is a good bit better.  Perhaps it is the newness and excitment that comes from a puppy, but I will never discount the therapy that comes from a wagging tail, soft sighs and warm cuddles from unconditional pet love.

Sunday Share : Prayer...it can be simple.

 

As a small child, prayer was easy.  It was a simple prayer recited at bedtime or the Lord's Prayer I had learned from my parents and Sunday School and then there were the responsive prayers at church, where the Pastor said who/what we were praying and the congregation would utter a statement in agreement...thanks be to God, O Lord hear our prayer, Amen, ...

I was always amazed to hear specific, intentional prayers led by leaders 'off the cuff'.  You know, when a small group is huddled or on the Christian radio show as someone calls in with a prayer request, and the words just flow from the prayer leaders mouth.  And they make sense and they hit the nail on the head.  It sounds just like it was written ahead of time and words leap from my devotional book from their mouths into our hearts and God's ears.  Yet it was completely unrehearsed.  And I am amazed.  And then I find myself saying, "Amen" because I am so moved by their ability to put the emotions and requests into words that He will hear.  And afterward I think, "Wow.  I will never been able to pray that well."

But you know what I have figured out? 

There is no right way to pray.  In fact, the only wrong way to pray is to simply not do it.  And I'm pretty certain that all of us have prayed somewhere along the way, whether we realize it or not.

How do you pray when you don't want to go with something written or one of the recitation prayers we learn in church or childhood?  It's simple.  You talk to God.  Really, prayer is just a conversation between you and Him.  It can be simple or complex; short or long.  Just talk.  Honestly, I am not a get-down-on-the-side-of-my-bed-and-kneel-with-hands-folded Jesus girl.  I am more the pray-in-the-moment-sometimes-hands-folded-sometimes-looking-up-sometimes-eyes-closed-just-doing-it-because-it-feels-right-and-i-need-it Jesus girl.  And you know what?  I am pretty sure He is okay with that because ... well, because I am talking to Him.

What's in a prayer?  Well that just depends on what is in your heart and what's in your head at that given moment.  My prayers are often short throughout the day.  Some are motivated by emotional need or thought or concern for a loved one.  Some are motivated by joy and gratefulness.  Sometimes they are even just out of a fleeting thought.  Honestly, if they are too long, I get lost and confused and particularly if they are before bed, I fall asleep long before the prayer finishes.  But you know what, He knows what's in my heart even when I don't finish the words.  It is okay. 

THE ONLY FAST AND HARD RULE TO PRAYER IS THAT YOU DO IT.  Just like the Nike logo, "JUST DO IT."

And when you don't know what to say or how to go about it, just invite Jesus in and He will guide you:  "Dear Lord, you know what is in my heart and what my needs are, please guide me."  Something like that.  It's so easy.  "Hear me, God."  "Help me, God."  He will know what you need.  Sometimes it is hard to see His answer and He doesn't always answer our prayers the way our hearts would want, but He is always there, with us, guiding gently in the manner in which He deems appropriate.  I know this to be true.  Seriously, I never prayed to get sick; in fact, the prayers uttered from my mouth (sometimes silently) since the second I became a mama were always, "Dear God, please keep me and Scott safe and healthy so we can be here for our kids."  Isn't that every parent's prayer and hope?  So I got sick...not exactly something I prayed for.  But you know what, in those dark nights when I prayed, particularly the ones after the immediate diagnosis when we didn't know what the next day would bring and we honestly had no clue if I would be around at all in the future or even make it out of the hospital, I knew God was with me.  I knew He heard me and I can still see where He was with me every step of my life.  Many nights I just said, "Dear God, be with me and my family and help us."  There is no wrong way to pray.  Just say something and reach out.

There are numerous resources available to help guide your prayers.  There are specific prayers to pray for specific circumstances and prayers that people have prayed over their children or their marriage or a sick loved one.  They are great and I do read them, but this is what I know that is more truer than what those wonderful people have written:  it does not matter what you speak of or omit in prayer.  If your heart is true and if you are faithful to the Maker, He hears the silent and voiced cries you have.  Your prayer doesn't have to be in 'correct form'.  You don't have to quote Bible verses or remember everything that you were ever taught about religion.  We are truly saved by grace through faith alone ... it is nothing you have done or can do, as cited in the book of Ephesians.

So, pray a little today. and tonight. and tomorrow.  That faith alone, that conversation alone, will give you the strength to make it through your many challenges...the big and the little...and it truly helps you focus on the big picture a little better.

If you really want specific prayers for specific circumstances, people or events, do a quick google search to find what you're looking for.  Sign up for a Proverbs 31 daily devotional.  I can't say enough about Lysa Terkeurst or Stormie Omartian.  They are two prayerful women who put their faith into words all of us can understand and benefit from.

Another thing that is sometimes helpful is to jot down your thoughts and who/what you want to pray for.  I have done this with the kids when I'm afraid we will forget something during our prayers.  We have small notebooks around the house and I use one of them or a sticky note to jot down what we need to pray for from time to time.  It's okay to look at a list while you pray.  It's okay to pray together and just have everyone talk out something that comes to their mind as you are praying.

And don't be afraid to pray in public or with friends.  Chances are someone else wants to do it or needs a prayer, yet they don't know how to go about it.

And, lastly, since I'm a visual person and definitely a music girl, here's some inspiration about prayer.

 

Monday Musings : You See; I Spy...

 

YOU SEE…a clock.

I SPY…time that ticks away, sometimes too fast and sometimes too slow; but more importantly, time that slips past us in which we don’t cultivate and grow our relationships with people and life and develop more of what truly matters.

YOU SEE...a pair of sneakers.

I SPY...feet moving toward a new-normal and a path of new discoveries and an opportunity to experience the details of life.

 

YOU SEE…clouds.

I SPY…my Maker, possibility and, oftentimes, rainbows or imaginary dogs or kites or hot air balloons, a palette of colors, and a vast endless possibility of what lies ahead of me.

 

YOU SEE…grass.

I SPY…new emerging from old.  Life emerging from death.  Green pushing through brown.

 

YOU SEE…dandelions and weeds infiltrating your lawn.

I SPY…the first symbols of love thrust into my face from a toddler’s hands and the many wishes I have made throughout my life..some answered; some not…but all reminders to keep on wishing.

 

 

YOU SEE…raindrops that will turn into mud puddles bringing wet socks through shoes and bring out worms to dodge.

I SPY...opportunities to jump over little critters and splash in the puddles while laughing with my kids or a day hunkered inside with a cup of hot tea and a book taking me to far-off lands.

 

You SEE what you want.

YOU SPY the incredible.

It's a matter of perspective and that is something that is uniquely yours. 

What little details are you focused on this week?

Faith on Friday : Good and Glorious, Indeed!

 

It is GOOD FRIDAY.  One of the most amazing days in a Christian’s faith.  Oh Glorious Day!

One wouldn’t necessarily equate the word “good” with a day of betrayal, beatings and the crucifixion of an individual.

And GLORIOUS?  What is glorious about nails being punctured into one’s hands and a crown of thorns placed upon a head, embedded into a scalp as the onlookers mocked.

Yet, Christ-followers declare today GOOD FRIDAY and this Sunday, Easter Day, is indeed a GLORIOUS DAY.

I was originally planning to detail the events that occurred from The Last Supper on Maundy Thursday through to the Crucifixion on Good Friday and the joy experienced when the stone was rolled away from the tomb on Easter Sunday.  However, a quick google search, or attendance at a church service, a reading of a devotional or a reading of any of the Gospels of the Next Testament can provided all of that information for you.

Instead I share this question that I shared with my friends on facebook.  Had you been living during the first Holy Week when Christ was unjustly arrested, tortured, tried, crucified and buried,  what.would.you.do? 

We were anxious a few years ago to share the phrase and thought of “What Would Jesus Do?” as a guiding principle.  Seriously, WWJD was everywhere…stickers, posters, t-shirts, pens, etc.  However, I believe the more important phrase, particularly if you profess to be a Christian, is “What Would You Do?”  I watched The Passion of the Christ the other evening and this thought kept running through my head…

if I was present, what would I do…

If I had seen the condemnation of Christ unfolding…

Where would I have been on the walk to Calvary? 

Where would you have been?

--would you have jeered at him along the roadside?

--would you have given shelter to him as he entered Jerusalem before Palm Sunday?

--ignored him?

--given him water?

--wipe his tears or his blood?

--carried the cross like Simon of Cyrene, and, more appropriately, carry Jesus as he stumbled on the walk to Calvary?

--would you have mocked him?

--watched in horror or shock or just to stare?

--wept at his feet?

--taken his blood-stained and punctured body to a tomb?

--worn the crown of thorns in his place?

--prayed for God to have mercy and take the pain away?

--denied knowing him?

--taken up a cross and walked with him?

--just looked the other way?

--would you have walked with Mary as she watched her son, the son of God, be tortured and murdered before a mother’s eyes?

 

Honestly, it pains me to think of where I might be during this journey.  I would love to think I would have spoken up and sacrificed myself, or, at the very least, wiped his tears and blood as he crawled to his painful, but necessary death.  However, I don’t know if my feet would have moved.  My heart would have, certainly, and in my heart I would know what to do.  My faith is strong, deeply rooted, but stepping out…publicly…when I would be condemned and tortured for one man…would I, could I do it?  Could you?  Could any of us really?

God knows we are weak and Because of Him, I don’t have to second guess what I would or would not do.  Jesus made that sacrifice so that if I couldn’t step out on faith, as long as I ask for forgiveness for my failings and believe in Jesus as our Messiah, I am still a child of God and I am forgiven all of my shortcomings and sins.  I will have a glorious day in heaven when my earthly walk is over.  Indeed, in this way, Christ’s crucifixion on the cross was a “Good” Friday and Easter Sunday, when he rose from the dead to join Our Father in heaven, is indeed a “Glorious Day”.

Thankfully, Christ's ultimate sacrifice on the cross thousands of years ago on this day, assures me that I don't have to worry or ask "what would I do?"  Christ takes away that fear of not measuring up and took the penalty for every shortcoming. 

I am not Mormon, yet I found this video clip from the Church of Latter-Day Saints extremely moving and I hope you enjoy it as well:  Because of Him

 Makes you think of everything we have...because of him...because of the cross...the sacrifice.

My favorite song for Easter is by Casting Crowns, “Glorious Day”.  This video, with the lyrics on the screen, help share and drive home exactly what Jesus came do in his life…”living he loved me, dying he saved me, buried he carried my sin far away…” If that is not a shining example of the amazing grace of our God, I don’t know what is.

   

As you go on egg hunts and fill baskets with treats, enjoying a feast with your family on this beautiful Easter weekend, think about a few nails, some wood, a "crown" of thorns and one man…and may your heart be filled with gratitude, humbleness and love for the gift you received 2000+ years ago on a Good Friday.

Words on Wednesday : Because I Can!

While I know everyone does not have the ‘luxury’ of recovering from a serious & life-threatening/altering illness, I also recognize that my ability to soak it all in may be limited (in a good way) as I will one day (with a few prayers) be able to return to a busier and more ‘normal’ routine of life where I work daily, can complete more chores and participate more physically in the hub-bub that is known as our family life of chaos.  Until that time, however, what I do, because I can, includes…

 Read a book on a rainy day on my sofa.

 Take photographs of little things that make me smile in awe of God’s hand…like the spring flowers coming up under the brown twigs of winter.

 Handcraft and send small tokens of love like cards or notes or mix cd’s to friends to let them know I’m thinking of them and so grateful to have them in my life.

 Cook and bake for my family and friends who take care of us during this crazy ride.

 Write and journal about the many thoughts and emotions that spill from my brain on any given hour.

  Just watch the clock tick by with the contentness of knowing that while I am not overly ambitious these days, I am here.

  Snuggle and hunker down with my kids to watch tv, chat or just be together without feeling rushed to do the next big thing.

  Examine and re-examine my walk of faith to remind myself of where I was, how I was set up to handle this journey and to be grateful for the little steps that prepared me for the long marathon.

  Share my perspective and opinion on savoring and pulling out the little details of life that often go overlooked in the chaos of day-to-day busy-ness that all of us fall into.

  Only engage in things that make me laugh, smile or feel good.  No dark humor, no scary stories, no real-life or crime sadness enters my ‘daily bubble’.  I dealt with enough of it through work prior to the illness and it became a source of great anxiety for me with my sudden diagnosis and severe illness.  The heart and human spirit can only take so much.

  Listen to the birds chirping outside of my window and feed the birds and the squirrels who are now residing in my backyard, their restaurant in the wild.  J  Sometimes, I even just camp out on the kitchen floor to watch them feast.

  Think about actually ‘doing’ something a long, long time before I actually move to accomplish a task.  And some days, I just don’t do anything…because I can, but also because I can’t find the energy or drive.  And that’s okay.

  Sometimes I just listen to the wind and the rain and instead of being sad, I marvel at how nature and the goodness of God provides for all things to grow and change.

  Listen to music…all genres…and sing along or pay attention to the words closely and allow them to resonate with some memory or current life event.

  Because I can…I am more acutely aware of every single detail of my life…my family, my friends, my loves, my likes and dislikes, tangible and intangible items…and every little shift and instance that gives me a change in perspective with hope for a future, and the patience and comfort in knowing that regardless of how this earthly walk ends, it was worth every second…good and bad…and was designed and executed exactly as it had planned to be.  And I will continue to make the best attempt I can at understanding that things [and life] happen at His will, not mine, or yours or anyone else’s and I will continue to do my best at accepting that.